I just bought the big bottle of Patron. It looks small. What have I done with my life?
Succeeded.
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
She thought someone was breaking in but when I said it was me she got even angrier and threw a coffee mug at my head.
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
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