I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
I woke up with a fake mustache stuck to my chest and I can't even hold down water.
He added his name to my To Do list. That's the way to my Type A heart.
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
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