is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
I'm chasing my vodka with snickers.
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
Randomize
