tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
Randomize
