I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
Today is the day I die from a hangover. I love you, mom. Farewell.
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
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