Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
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