Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
My dog ate my bag of weed. Thats not the easiest call to the vet to make.
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
I'm with the hottest fuckin fire fighter right now. I'm ready to fake my own death.
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
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