Dude just bought condoms some sad fuck next to me buying a pregnancy test he gave me a look like he'd pay me millions to switch places
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
I wish dancing around my house in my bra and underwear to Love Shack whilst eating strawberry cake batter was an acceptable form of exercise.
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
I learned the hard way a garbage bag will not save you when jumping from a tree at 2am
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