you guys were way drunker than both of me
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
Her text was so long it had an arrow to expand it. You know it's bad when even your iPhone can't handle her
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
Just had to tell a NYC cop I was doing the Dougie in a houndstooth jumper so he could find me in the security video.
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
I'm sorry you had to knock him out on your birthday. But that also means I won the bet that you'd hit someone so you owe me 40. dollars
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
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