Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
Please come collect your inebriated significant other. He just sleep-farted and scared my cats. Please hurry.
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
I think it’s appropriate to celebrate the start of mother’s day at the bar with the men that almost made me a mother
Randomize
