No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
I ate so much cake that I can't even enjoy a blowjob
That's the most first world problem I've ever heard in my life.
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
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