She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
I am going to wait until he wakes up to set his couch on fire and then pee it out. That way he knows it was not an accident.
Whoever invented the gimlet should be given a medal and then shot
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
Randomize
