he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
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