So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
The universe is cradling this hangover like a gay couple cradles their newly adopted chinese baby.
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
Randomize