At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
My entire summer has consisted of being too drunk for this shit, too sober for this shit, or too hungover for this shit.
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
Randomize
