Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
You're dating a nurse! That's smart, you never know when you'll have a medical emergency. Probably liver failure.
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
Randomize
