The shirt is mine, the pants are mine, the bra not so much
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
Woke up in 100% not my clothes this morning. Third time this month. Fuck. Tequila.
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
"Little drunk?" Honey you were "livetweeting" Sublime's "Sublime" album while it was playing in his car, and at one point you said you hoped they play Santeria. "Little drunk" doesn't cover it.
I have an epic ass bruise from a wheel tonight and I am drunk now because I decided vodka heals all wounds.
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
Randomize
