even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
She made me pour olive oil on her.
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again
Randomize
