in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
Fucken Tweens. They smelled like cotton candy and hand jobs my nostrils were offended.
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
I'm pretty sure the rest of my evening will consist of masturbating, drinking tequila and watching children's movies.
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize
