bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
bouncer thought i was tryin to get the license plate numbers of strippers to stalk them. I had to go show him where I threw up to get back in.
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
Paying 5 grand for boobs is saving me like 10 grand in weed
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
I really don't want to. I just don't know how to nicely say "dude I'm having a rough time in life right now and I just need to dress like a stripper cop, get shit faced, and have dirty crazy sex"
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
I just matched with a taco on tinder. Dreams come true.
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
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