whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
We should never set our expectations higher than pizza bagels cause then our night is bound to get better
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
me + whiskey = a bad person
I need to wash the frat house off of me
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
Randomize
