I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
You pretended to be Borat in that weird slingshot bathing suit and then proceeded to send another dick pic/nude selfie and said you weren't naked because you were wearing a hat.
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
Randomize
