You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize
