I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME THERE WAS A LOAF OF BANANA BREAD IN THE OVEN BEFORE YOU LEFT FOR A 5 HOUR SHIFT??
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
I just met a drunk old lady with a bedazzled life alert alarm around her neck. I love casinos
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
Randomize
