why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
There is a drunk marine passed out on my porch. Mandy wouldn't sleep with him, Can you please come remove him?
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
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