So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
I needed to borrow my dads nail clippers and next to it was an industrial size box of condoms if that wasnt bad enough I dropped the clippers behind the bed and discovered hundreds of used condoms
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
Just dunked an oreo in a white russian. Trying to think of a better experience in my life and failing.
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
i forgot how awkward it is to meet new people sober
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
Ultimate cock block. About to have sex and your mom calls you so you can go help your grandmother figure out how to vote for the voice on her iPad
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
Randomize