Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
Uuh, dude you came running out of the bar screaming you didn't want to hear that song, ran face first into a truck, spun around 3 times and hit the sidewalk. I tried to catch you.
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
I was drunk and on Craigslist.. The drunk-text offers people got must have been either horrifying or glorious
Morning! Got your 3am VM to remind you to get up for spin class and also confirm you were not murdered by the sketchy guy at brunch yesterday. So this is your literal and metaphorical wake up call.
I think we have some hyper-understanding of each other when drunk, because looking back at our text convo from last night, they were literally just jumbled letters.
Randomize
