that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
Judging from the sharpie on my face, glitter on my chest and women's tiger print panties i'm wearing last night was a thing.
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Randomize
