Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
I asked her why she was drunkenly masturbating to Iron Man and all she replied was "Robert Downey Jr". As far as excuses go, that seemed pretty legit.
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
She dry humped my leg in the raw while I was still dressed, came, and then fell asleep on top of me. All I got was a bruised thigh. 2020 needs to end.
Randomize