found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
I bought a police grade breathalyzer on ebay at 4:37 am. At least I'm a responsible drunk.
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
Randomize
