Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
I'm at a winery and there's a 50 yr old woman sitting at a table alone with a bottle of wine and the only time I've seen her get up is to harass the hot dog guy
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
On the train at 650am after a night of clubbing and running away from a new zealander who was buying us beers but also licking windows
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
Randomize
