so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
Responsibility: Hiding your beer when your DWI clients who are out on bond come to talk to you at bars.
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
How do I explain to work that I woke up in my underwear on a trampoline and that I'm not coming in?
Randomize
