I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
Today I met the neighbor that shares my bedroom wall. When I pointed out my unit, he said, "Oh, that's you? Oh... that's you." I didn't think much of it until I was in bed tonight and I heard him clear his throat. He's. Heard. Everything.
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
I POOPED CONFETTI TOO. Ingested unacceptable amount of it oh my god can I die from this?
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
Randomize
