Where is the hickey?
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
What vodka is american?
Skyy. I already looked it up for 4th of july.
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
Bad part of last night: I puked in my hair. Good part of last night: I assembled a posse.
You kept pulling me aside saying "look what I found"
Randomize
