Just chased the kids into the backyard with kitchen knives. Best. Babysitters. Ever.
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
mom just found 19 empty wine bottles in my closet. i hate spring cleaning
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
I'm about to make existential crisis tacos.
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
Randomize