I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
Just heard the garage door open and I immediately sprinted to the laptop to erase history, even though I haven't watched porn today...I believe Pavlov now.
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
If I had pants on, you wouldn't be getting this text message
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
I think God is sending me all these 20 year olds to make up for wasting my 20's in that crappy ass marriage. Thanks Big Guy!
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