you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
Just told my boss I wasn't coming in to work because of a serious case of blue balls. Totally made having them worth it.
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
Randomize
