i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
I walked in on you eating olive oil off of a plate. you gave me this look and I just started crying. we were that drunk.
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
Randomize
