Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
i celebrated the independence of our country by dry heaving tequila all morning. so classy. happy 4th.
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
dude i feel like at any given point 3/5 of that family is trying to fuck you
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
Lots of rum and cokes. Bartender wore my underwear on his head. Lost my keys. Accidentily started a fight. DC is going to kill me
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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