I want to jerk off but my dog won't leave me alone. It's the most depressing cock block ever.
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
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