I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
Sorry if that was awkward, i will never call you sober ever again
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
Randomize
