did I really admit that id have sex with that cougar had I been more drunk?...ugh...i need to masterbate more
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
my mom asked if I found my Easter basket. it's 1PM & I got home an hour ago from last night. if I'm looking for anything, it's my dignity.
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
Trying to figure out these fractions. I bought 5 fifths of gin last week. Does that mean I have one whole gin? 5/5 = 1, right? You're having to homeschool your kids right now--so ask them.
Randomize