It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
Sorry, I don't speak sober.
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
Because of you I'm damaged goods. I'm a fucking soup can and you dropped me.
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
Randomize
