I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
Rubbed one out while on hold to buy tickets to Disneyland. Feel simultaneously like a freak and strangely productive.
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
How does one acquire holy water?
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
Randomize
