dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
Amanda Bynes on the cover of maxim is my 8th grade masturbation fantasy come to life
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
Are we still banned from the library?
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
I just found a voice recording from Tanya's bachelorette party when we found you drunk in downtown being harassed by a crazy dude dressed like a clown and we rescued you. Attached is a voice recording of me interviewing you after we found you. I titled it Carlos Batman.
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
Randomize
