The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
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