Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
Dude I was taking a shower and I kept looking down at the drain expecting Mario to come up, yell "It's a me, Mario!", tickle my balls, and go back down the drain.
In the world of sexual, erotic texting, you rank somewhere between "how much teeth do you want" and "how dry do you want it"
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
I literally forgot every French word I knew and blurted out “mange moi” so he went down on me like I was some baguette fresh outta the oven!!!! I passed out.
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
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