Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
I'm dedicating this beer to drunk texting
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
