what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
There was a selfie of you in the dark pointing at the camera with a duck face. You sent it to my 60 year old mother with the caption "you behave"
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
Randomize
