just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
so he just called his new girlfriend by my name and she was too drunk to even notice how awkward..
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
I'm so drunk I forgot what to do to go pee.
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
woke up to two girls crawling on top of me forcefeeding me bacon. Best. Hangover. Ever.
Randomize
