this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
Hey, sorry for threatening to teabag your mom to death last night
I can hear the pillow talk now, "how many condoms did you bring? Good, put them all on,"
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
Randomize
